You bring your newborn at home and you are a parent now .. amazing and most confusing time in your life .
You want to raise him into a independent ,happy person but what is the right way to do it.As they grow they simply walk a tightrope between needing us and pushing us away.One moment you get hugs and kisses and the next he sas get out of the room.
Part of this growing independent person is they telling us a lot of “no.”
This is a way your child is testing the limits how far he can go with his demands and wanting s and you might have moments when you feel you are caught in an exhausting cycle of power struggles,I know I do .
Having kids means L
-ever-changing sleep patterns,
and it also means power struggles.
In this moment you need to be aware that it’s not your fault,nor that you have spoiled your kid ,it is simply a part of growing up proces.
There are some things you can do to break the cycle.
Parents want to raise well-behaved children that will respect us because we work hard to give him/her beautiful childhoods and it is normal to be frustrated when our simple request is so hard for them to obey.
To win the fight here is what you need to do :
1. Don’t back him into a corner
- young children are sensitive so making them feel backed into a corner in a direct confrontation
- situations when you look at your kid and repeat your request with tense voice is a bad one
- you need to go one step back and take a breath
- then let him save face while still doing what you asked
- or just walk away while he comply
- or tell him that you have to finish up something in the kitchen and then you may help him out if he’s not done .
- you need to make him feel like he maintained his autonomy while doing what he was asked
- walk away to give him a chance to reconsider his NO
2. Don’t try to reason
- it is easy to get them ready on time when there is a reward on the end
- but how to make them do their chores without buying ice cream every time they clean their room
- first you ask and after his usual NO you calmly explain why he needs to do that and smile at him
- there are moments when their No is very firm and then you ask again, with an edge to your voice
- this is the moment when you need to calmly walk over to him and ask to help him out
- taking action and joining him to do his chores will save you a fight and losing your temper
3. Don’t give the behavior power
- there are things that you physically can’t stop your child from doing
- whining, using a bad word, yelling or repeating annoying sound,wetting his blouse every time h washes his hands and so on I can write for all day
- this are situations when we need to remind ourselves that our children is not being “bad”
- he simply being a child and test our limits
- stay calm because the bigger your reaction is the bigger their resistant becomes
- control your reaction when your child does something annoying because if you don’t react, it’s not interesting, and he will move on.
Love your kids because they are the light in your life…